is been 4 years i made tat decision..a decision which i cant fullfil till now..for these years, i 4gt tat i made such decision, such pledge..i lost the heart, the energy, the fire of desire to stay wif tat decision...time drifted me apart frm thr...looking back, looking now, my frends, my roommate whu made the decision is gona graduate this year..ready to harvest the field for GOD...bt me, still at here, struggling to find myself, finding my path, finding the light...

now i remember wad i said, i stand up tat nite, in front of the ppl, pledging...but, i failed...i failed every1 hope, failed my own hope...i dunno y i lost it, as if i fell into deep canyon, slipped into dark cavern...whr no1 can see, no1 can reach, no1 will understand the darkness tat i endure, the pain i suffer, the loneliness i experience...

yesterday suddenly i remember this, i feel ashame, deeply ashame...y i 4gt to protect my own heart frm bein walking astray??as this is the main lesson i should learn frm tat 3 months??how can i 4gt???

now, am i gud enuf for this?am i prepared?am i worth to walk this path???am i goin to fulfil this pledge??i dunno..as i walked astray, dropped into mud, filthy, ugly, despise by ppl, unable to find back the path tat i used to walk...struggling hard to find back, bt will i be accepted??or i lost the chance 4eva??will i be punished 4eva cox failing it??

now my heart wish to continue like the days be4, but i dunno am i worth for it, or im able to do it....


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in the mean time~~
pls stop giving me heart att!!
dun shock me wif such sudden news!!
OH NO!!!STOP be 2geTher wIf sm1 So suDden!!!
he In Love again!!HAHAHAHA!!!!
oh ya..thx ur snack frm the land of sun 1st!!even do9h i havnt taste it.hehe